Dear Obama, You suck.
June 29, 2011 § Leave a comment
This is a story about being a grown up. This is a story about doing grown up things like buying a car. This is a story about how Obama made doing grown up things like buying a car stupid.
Politics, it just got personal.
The thing is, our wonderful, awesome, named Raul Chevy Equinox reached 97,652 miles. It was wheezing it’s last breaths, poor old thing, and as I was driving down the road I a mental note: “Ask husband about exchanging car.” So the husband and I discussed the terrible shape our Chevy was in; the transmission was screwy, the ignition kicked on only half the time you turned the key, the dash lights didn’t work, there was no ABS, and the most terrible part of all, the CD player was broken.
That’s when we decided that even though we still owed $3555.94 on the car, it was best to trade it in before it reached 100,000 miles and lost any value or warranty it had. Plus, knowing our luck, it would reach 100,001 miles and it would go caput.
You know, I’m so glad I did go to college on full loans. I was able to enjoy life and study hard without worrying about keeping 18 jobs just to pay for my education. But it sure does suck to have to pay back $60k+ to a failing government. Especially now that any money we would have to put toward a car note is going into maintaining our debt. The only car note we did have was on the Chevy, and that very small monthly payment could not budge up even a dollar for this new(ish) car that we needed to get.
Unlike most of my peers, the husband and I continually think ahead. So we knew exactly what we wanted: a car about as big as our Chevy, preferably not red, that had less than 50k miles and would last us for 5+ years. Basically a car that, as a family, we could grow in to. And, of course, it had to be the same amount as our regular car note.
After spending 7 hours at various dealerships, turns out the only thing we could afford was to lease a tiny car approx $15k or to buy a vehicle less than $10k, and that usually meant the car would have about 75k miles on it already.
And by the way, dealerships are the worse timesucks ever. You go in, make some talk, and walk out 5 hours later shocked at how much time you spent in there. They’re like the black holes of retail.
Thanks to Obama, who instituted “Cash for Clunkers” that got rid of all the crap cars, the decent used cars jumped about $5k in price. So any nice pre-owned cars were sky high out of our price range. Pre-CFC, we would be able to get a 30k mile car about the size of our Chevy for about $10k. Well let me tell you, in the state of Mass., a car like that is not to be found. In fact, any decent car in our price range does not exist.
Dear Obama, I had no qualms about you before, really. I even stood up for you when haters called you a terrorizing Muslim. But you know what? You suck.
Buying a car is like looking for an apartment. It starts out fun; it makes you feel like a grown up. And then, 8 dealerships and 20 hours later, you’re banging your head on the car salesman’s desk moaning, “This isn’t fun anymore,” and you’re basically ready to purchase the first car someone says you just might maybe could afford.
And all those college loans? You know, the ones that everyone tells you is really “good debt?” Yeah, they deplete any worth your credit score just might have. In fact, when the credit score is printed, all you get is a page that says, “You’re so broke we’re not really sure how you’re ever going to climb out of that hole. Go buy a bike.”
Thank you, failing economy, for making interest rates so high.
We had to buy a car. We had to buy a car before the first of July before my college loans made our credit score any worse. At this point our tactic became this:
Step one: Walk into car dealership.
Step two: Find dealer. (This isn’t hard, since they flock around like hawks ready to prey on innocent victims.)
Step three: Tell dealer your price range. Ask him to show us what they have.
Step four: If they tell you there’s nothing, and this usually is the case, proceed to next dealer. If they tell you they have something, proceed to step five.
Step five: Listen to the deal and go out to take a look at the car. See the car, realize it’s one your grandmother drives, doesn’t even have power windows, and is actual a manual, which neither of you can drive. Make note: Learn to drive stick.
So of course, we do what any red-blooded American does when they become utterly desperate.
“Dear God, please give us a car. Please give us a car with four wheels and an engine. Please give us one that runs.”
And then, we walked into a Nissan dealership. We walked in and found a dealer. We told the dealer our price range. The dealer came back and said we could afford to lease a Sentra. We test drove the Sentra. We fell in love with said car. Dealer says they have no base model, so we’re forced to take a 2011 model with heated, leather seats with a navigational system, rear backup camera with sensors, free bluetooth and XM radio, and, my favorite part, an iPod hook up.
Says us to the dealer: “We’ll take it.”
And when we heard that the price range was $10 too much, we still took it. And when we called to switch our insurance, we got a $16 discount. And we added an oil package that gives us free oil changes for 3 years.
And that, my friends, is how we ended up with this beautiful car that will cost us $3 more than what our dying Chevy was costing.
And you know what? We’re naming it Skippy. And we’re going to drive it everywhere. Until it reaches the max mileage our lease allows or we have to give it up at the end of the three years. And of course we can’t eat in it or write in it or bump it too hard because we don’t want to ruin this car that we only kind of own so that we don’t have to pay back too much at the end of our lease.
But no matter. Because for at least three years, we’re going to be driving in style.
No thanks to you, Mr. President.