Marriage, Debunked.

May 24, 2011 § 1 Comment

After one year of marriage, here’s what I’ve learned:

  1. You are not twice as rich.  In fact, when you double the bills and school debt and so forth, you’re actually twice as poor.  And no, you can not live on love.  Love is abstract.  It definitely does not pay the rent on my apartment or pay off my school loan.  But, occasionally, it does make me dinner.
  2. The first year of marriage is not the toughest.  In fact, it’s the easiest.  Okay, maybe not for everyone, but honestly, if this is what I have to look forward to the rest of my marriage years, well, lemme say, it’s going to be a cakewalk.
  3. A good marriage–you know, like my awesome one–is not stereotyped.  We both buy the groceries, we both cook dinner, we both clean the house, we both pay bills, we both do a budget, and we are both awesome at playing interior design.  Although, I don’t hang stuff up on the walls, or nail things in, or use power tools.  But not because I’m a girl.  It’s because I’m terribly, terribly, unqualified.
  4. The food gets better as the years go on.  You know, cause the wife has had ample time to practice.  I’d say this is true, but not because I don’t know how to cook.  Actually, my food is so good now, I’ll probably be able to win Top Chef by year 50.  No, I’d say the more the husband cooks, the more his food gets better.  But I won’t complain, because anytime I don’t have to cook is a good night in my book.
  5. Your in-laws are not out to get you.  They don’t hate you, wish you dead, or cry themselves to sleep at night moaning, “Why did that evil cuss word marry my son?!?!”  Although some parents are crazy enough to do this, most are not.  In-laws are pretty awesome.  Especially when you live a million miles away from your childhood home, state, and an entire extended family, in-laws are pretty awesome to have.  They buy you stuff, like groceries and fire extinguishers and car batteries.  And they like to feed you any night of any week.

Year one has been pretty nice.  I’m really excited to see what year two has in store for us.  For our anniversary, we drove to Springfield and went to Six Flags, the Springfield Museums, the Armory, the Yankee Candle Museum and store in South Deerfield, and Emily Dickinson’s house in Amherst.

So I leave you with this picture.

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§ One Response to Marriage, Debunked.

  • Shelly says:

    Thanks for sharing this awesome overview of marriage! Congrats on your first year and glad it was amazing. I’m with you – this next year should be amazing!

    Sounds like your trip was shamazing! :)))

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